King of Excellent (according to Scaryduck)

Friday, January 21

More jammy then Mr. Jammy of Jammy Dodgers getting covered in jam.
Jammy dodger

A good friend of mine, we will call him Mr. Jammy, has been rather jammy over this past month or so. In fact, in Manchester a local chav might be heard calling him a "spawny get*".

He couldn't believe his luck when he got the telephone call from his local DIY store a few days before christmas, letting him know his new kitchen was now ready for collection. He phoned me, rather excitedly, and asked if he could have a lift there to collect the kitchen. I said okay, but I was rather puzzled when I arrived to collect him, to see he had not only already got the kitchen, but in the short time since the call had installed it, plumbed it in, floored around it, and even painted the walls around it AND the paint was dry. The reality was they'd messed up. We went to get the kitchen anyway (well you would wouldn't you?) and took it home already to be installed after a month's 'error realisation' period.

Lucky huh? £800 worth of new kitchen units for free.

So, when he gets a knock at his door delivering the new torch he's had free from a mail order catalogue, he is surprised to find he had had it delivered the week before. Again, Mum's the word.

New torch anyone?

To cap it all, he needs a new phone from one of the main service providers. They've run out, so they promise it will be posted next week when the stock is replenished. In the meantime, he finds that a local shop of the same provider has the phone in stock, and they agree it would be easier to cancel said order, and to give him a phone from stock. Makes sense huh?

So, guess what gets delivered this week. Yep, a new phone, all boxed, NO SIM! Like they knew he'd already had it from the shop.


P.S. If you want more then one item of something, try buying it in Swansea. You never know your luck.

*chav speak for "lucky person"