King of Excellent (according to Scaryduck)

Friday, May 20

On Old Ladies

Taken from a newspaper in Sarasota, Florida.
An elderly lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle.
She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her lungs, "I HAVE A GUN, AND I KNOW HOW TO USE IT! GET OUT OF THE CAR!"
The four men didn't need to wait for the second threat, and got out and ran for it.
The lady, somewhat shaken up, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back seat, and got into the front. She was so shaken up in fact, she couldn't get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then she realised why. It was the same reason she wondered why there was a football, a frisbee and two 12 packs of beer in the front footwell.
A few minutes later, she found her own car, parked four or five spaces down.
She loaded her shopping into her own car and then drove to a local police station to report her mistake. The sergeant on the front desk was inconsolable with laughter. Pointing to the other end of the counter, she saw four pale men, who were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun.
No charges were filed.

Have a good weekend y'all